The Not So Final 4 Reasons to Hang the Banner

So the first two posts were easy pickins'. Seriously, how hard is it to toss stones through the glass house that Coach K has built? Fortunately for him, Texas can't shoot free throws or that private school pinata would be getting whacked senseless right about now.

It's time though to do something that 90% of Tarheel fans do not do and that is objectively look at what lies ahead of this year's edition of UNC basketball. You might not like to hear it, but this team is going to come up short. I hope I am wrong, but here is why:

REASON 1: Tyler Hansbrough & The Softies - What???? Mr. All-American? Mr. Hustle? Mr. So What if I Look Like Beaker from the Muppets? Mr. Eyes & Mouth Wide Open with Contacts Popping Out Every Time Down the Court? Yes, Tyler Hansbrough, as well as his front court mates, are the main reason that UNC will not win the National Championship in 2009. Carolina should handle the Zags fairly easily just on pure athleticism, but a matchup against Villanova in the Final 4 or the likes of Memphis, Louisville or UConn on the other side of the bracket spells doom for Hansbrough and the soft big men Thompson & Davis. Hansbrough will struggle mightily against the big, athletic players he will face and those garbage buckets will be hard to come by. You saw it yesterday versus LSU when the Heels were dominated on the glass for the first 30 minutes before Ed Davis decided he wasn't a thin, wiry freshman. Unfortunately, LSU is the best team from a mediocre Southeast Conference. The four other teams the Heels will undoubtedly collide with at some point are more athletic, more physical and spell trouble for Mr. Hansbrough.

Dare I utter the phrase "Go Duke?" just so I can buy another Final 4 appearance. Plus, do you really want to hear Jim Nantz manlove on the guy anymore? I have to wave the mercy hankie. Thanks for the good times Tyler and hope you can make millions posting 11pts & 10 boards again for a middle of the pack NBA team.

REASON 2: Danny Green - Holy cow...someone bring back the player that the Heels rode through the early ACC Conference season. This guy put us on his back & carried us after the 0-2 start, but perhaps it completely broke his back. The last two weeks of watching Danny Green have reminded us of how careless he was with the basketball as a freshman and how bad he can be. Maybe the late 3 (after an amazing hustle play by Wayne Ellington) versus LSU pulls him out of his funk. Otherwise, he looks like the most likely candidate to assume the Final 4 choke throne that Shammond Williams & Rick Fox have passed on from generation to generation with embarrassing efforts from the perimeter on the big stage.

REASON 3: The Toe - I usually don't hide behind the injury bug, but just how good has Ty Lawson been over the last half of the ACC season. Ever since being embarrassed by Jeff Teague at Wake, Lawson appears to be on a mission. I'm sure it hurts like the devil, but assuming he plays and they get by Gonzaga, will he be able to bounce back in just two days again the Oklahoma-Syracuse winner? Tough call. Will be rooting for the Sooners though b/c a matchup zone & a hot team in 'Cuse may prove fatal.

REASON 4: Roy - Personally, I do like Roy Williams the person. I like the way he downplays things, the aw shucks act, etc...but his ability to draw up plays in tight games is downright mediocre. I can tell you right now, if they are down 1 or 2pts that Wayne Ellington is going to rub off two defenders and miss a long, offbalance 3-pt jumper. Pssst...Roy, you're down a basket, not 3 pts. It's maddening...seen the act one too many times & it will rear its ugly head when we get into a grind it out game versus the likes of a Villanova or Uconn.

This also ties back into Reason 1...you can't go to Hansbrough for an important bucket with the game on the line because you don't get foul calls late in a tight game & he can't get his own shot off in the post against a bigger man. This will spell heartbreak for Carolina when push comes to shove.

Again, I hope I miss the mark worse than a center graduating from Wojo's Big Man Camp...but the brackets & matchups will have to fall just right on the road to the Championship. Final 4? Great chance. Hanging another banner in Chapel Hill? I'm afraid it's just another 30-win team coming up short of expectations.

Status Updates

I'm sure many of you recently read about the now ex-Philadelphia Eagles staff member that was fired over his overzealous Facebook Status Update - yes, the one that misspelled both 'damn' and 'retarded' in a 4-word phrase/sentence. For those of you that missed it, that would be "Dam Eagles R Retarted"in reference to the release of long-time Eagle great Brian Dawkins being set free on the open market to the Denver Bronocos.

.....Okie Doakie then Dan.

I'm sure he really didn't mean any harm, but for folks that don't understand why he got fired & actually think he should file suit versus the Eagles organization...well...you're probably just as incompetent. Let's face it folks - I don't necessarily agree with it, but would you post that on a Facebook Status Update for your employer (as well as anyone else) to read on a social networking site? Thanks for playing, but you probably wouldn't when push came to shove.

However, one man's trash is another man's treasure and while Facebook and passion for sports led to Dan Leone's demise, I see it as a wonderful opportunity to combine too of my favorite leisure diversions to entertain the masses.

With that I will now borrow some real estate in the minds of today's newsmakers in sports and let you know what their Facebook Status updates look like this evening of March 10th:

Greg Zoubek: Greg would like to know when I can stop icing this thing

Greg Paulus: Greg would like to know when I can stop icing Greg's thing

Mike Krzyzewski: Mike needs to stop shooting ads and start recruiting Division I talent again at the other 3 starting positions

Y.E. Yang: Y.E. won a PGA tour event and I bet you my prize money you don't know what either the Y or the E stand for

Mike Helton: Mike knows that cars wandering aimlessly in circles is no longer gettin'er done

Terrell Owens: Terrell is going to be one cold, windburned mother****** in about 6 months

Shawn May: Shawn hopes his boss didn't see him looking like a fat nancy with a glittery teeshirt on behind the Tarheels bench at the UNC-Duke game

Roy Williams: Roy is screwed if he has to put the ball in Larry Drew II's hands for more than :90 a game

Pat Summitt: Pat is a man baby!

Jim Calhoun: Jim is tired of Pitt and is about to relax in his big bathtub of money